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conflict
August 2007 
Dilemna
Posted on Apr 11th, 2007
by 
Wendy
Wendy
So the job saga continues...I have been offered a position by another university. Yeah! I'm excited about this opportunity. The down side of things is that the salary they offered me doesn't take into consideration the cost of living or the experience I have. I will counter their offer but there is a part of me that is in a bit of a dilemna about all of this: I know I can make a valuable contribution to the department and to the field I'm in BUT does asking for more money seem to be too greedy and opportunistic? I have this do-gooder personality in me that says "It doesn't matter, as long as you do good for other people". Then there's another part of me that says, "but what about doing good for yourself?"
I would love to hear people's opinions about this. And as a side note, I just wish the job process was a lot easier!
Also, if anyone has any tips on how to negotiate, I would greatly appreciate your suggestions.
I would love to hear people's opinions about this. And as a side note, I just wish the job process was a lot easier!
Also, if anyone has any tips on how to negotiate, I would greatly appreciate your suggestions.
Access: Public
I can totally understand what you say about the “do-gooder” mentality. Been there, done that and have a whole closet full of tee-shirts to prove it.
“Doing good” for others doesn't mean you exclude yourself in the equation. If you're stressed out about money, or can't take a decent vacation once in a while, what kind of good are you going to be to anyone else? Money is a tool. A necessary tool. It isn't evil. It's a reality. I don't think service to others and making a decent living are mutually exclusive. I can't help too much with negotiating tips, but I can say one thing. Believe you are worth it… . because if you don't, they won't. Best of luck.
IMO:
For your first job out of school, it is better to look at a situation and not money. After you have a track record, money negotiations are better accepted.
What does your heart tell you about you valuing you?
Thanks for your comments, Otter and Spirit Flower. And thanks for the provoking question Jeremiah. I have been thinking a lot about this dilemna and the more I think about it, the more conflicted I get. But that little voice inside tells me to speak the truth.
The truth is that this will be my first job out of my doctoral program but will not be my first job ever.
The truth is that the majority of professors in this university also have other consulting businesses outside of the university that provide another source of income because the cost of living is ridiculously high. The truth is that this would be my only source of income as I am not an American citizen and am bound to work only for the university.
The truth is that people in academia are sorely compensated for the work they put in. If I continued with my practice as a clinician, I would be making more than what the university has offered me.
The truth is that I would be doing a disservice to future academics by saying that it's okay to pay me this amount because we are not worth more.
The truth is that I am sad to see that the majority of people in this society contribute more to the income of movie and sports stars than they do to education and health.
I guess the conclusion I've come to is that I will be asking for more money because I truly do believe that it will serve the highest good for everyone involved.
YES!!!! Great work Dear Heart. Being in integrity with one's Self comes first for me.
Blessed Is,
Jeremiah
Wendy,
Take a look at the energy alert that jeremiah has posted in his blog. Think about the concept of “store front” touched on there. Think of getting a job more as the location where you will have your store front. If it feels right, the money won't matter and the money will increase with time.
Three years ago, just after leaving the monastery, I worked as a cahsier in a bakery for $8.75/hr. I could not get a job as an engineer; but the year in the bakery was a fabulous store front and exactly where I was supposed to be.
Anyway….isn't processing emotions fun!
Love,
Laura
Whats important the job or money? what will give you satisfaction? the current job or a newer one.Mr. Jeremiah has said it all.
dear Wendy - and everyone, wonderful posts.
A friend of mine has been through something very similar. She was offered a prestigious post at a university here in Germany - and the 'money' issue was an issue. She went through months of negotiations, and all the while wondered if this was 'the right thing to do' - to do the job/ to ask for the money she felt was appropriate and what she needed to do her job well and so on.
What she told me was lovely - that the process itslef was an enlightening one, that she 'grew' and expanded through it - it wasn't always easy, not at all - so many meetings, many people antagonistic at her approach, but she said she learned so much and got to feel and experience her own worth. In a way, the job became incidental.
Good luck, dear one. I believe you are worth it - and, as others have said, what is it *you* want - what is it that you feel will stretch and challenge you ( in the best way ) and inspire you - the job, another job, the process of asking for what you want… whatever. The more you grow, the more we grow, sharing in your beauty and strength.
I'm looking forward to what unfolds!
Love,
Sandra